A kitchen maid, an ex-Chamberlain, Nasrudin and his parrot?

Alleyway

The small alley winds through the center of the \"doughnut\" that is outer Umbar. The alleys varies from five to 20 feet in width, and is lined with the fronts and backs of warehouses. Between buildings you sometimes see someone looking out at you, and more than a few of the smaller alleyways are definitely inhabited. A small broken bit of pavement reveals a deep and foul smelling hole down into (apparently) the sewers below the city.

The day sky is clear with only slight wisps of clouds overhead. The late morning spring air is hot and dry around you. The moon is waxing gibbous.

Contents:

Qute

Obvious exits:

North and SouthEast

[Naureen(#30298)]

A dark day for dark business. Or at least that\'s what it looks like in the dingy and dirty alley in the back Rath Bad-nez, where the overpowering stench of the sewers offends the nostrils until one feels quite sick to the stomach! And here, in the hidden by-lanes of the city, even the grey light of a new dawn fails to lift the stifling air of gloom. Ah, but that doesn\'t seem to matter for this one black-clad figure who is strolling down the road, like she was taking a walk in the park. She must really come from the ghettos of Umbar, because no one in their right mind would roam around here, unless there were searching for scraps or hiding from good and proper society.

And then--noises apart from the scuffling of footsteps against the rough road are heard!

Quickly looking around her shoulder the figure stops to investigate the maker of the sound.

A small smile shines from behind her hooded cloak, as Naureen spots nothing more than a thin rat sniffling about for food. Alas, the poor bugger looks quite starved! Maybe he also lives in the sewers under the Black Tower, on which hard times have fallen.

[Qute(#19829)]

From the narrow pathway winding in from the north walks a lone, darkly clad feminine figure. It is wrapped in dark robes and shawls, with the woman\'s face being partly concealed by a thin grey scarf worn around the head, and over her mouth and nose. Only her eyes may be seen peering out towards the exit of the alleyway up ahead as she walks with a hurried pace, apparently on her way to some place where must not be late. A hand is held over the veil on her face, the hand whose wrist carries a jewelled bracelet which contrasts with her rather bland and poor commoner clothing. The piece of jewellery is mostly hidden from view, but a tiny glimmer of it reflects the rays of the sun, casting off a small beacon of light from her wrist. Quite an unusual sight around these parts, indeed. The woman is quick to tug at her sleeve, covering the small bit of jewelery lest someone might plan to rob her. A quick, critical glance is cast around her surroundings, and the woman decides to lag her pace so as not to rouse suspicion. Her eyes eventually land upon the figure just up the pathway whose features appear quite familiar. A smile spreads across the woman\'s covered lips, and she send a curt nod towards Naureen. \"Interesting meeting you here, especially at this.. early hour,\" the woman comments. Her tone is flat and dry, more neutral than either friendly or rude.

[Naureen(#30298)]

Lowering her head cover, Naureen stares at Qute. \"You,\" she remarks. \"Aren\'t your the kitchen maid?\" There is just the slightest hint of superiority in her tone, but it is easy to overlook it by the lovely smile that one sees on her face, next. She shrugs her shoulders with casual ease of nonchalence and adds, with a chuckle of light laughter. \"Well, I certainly didn\'t expect to run into you here,--\" And her eyes narrow as she delves into her brain to search for a name to the face. She laughs, again, \"The recent events have made my memory quite weak with all the worrying, but why don\'t you jog it and tell me your name?\"

Naureen\'s dark gaze is cast on Qute, watchfully, she does catch a sight of the glimmering jeweled bracelet just before it was hidden away under the sleeve. Ignoring to make a comment on it just yet, she smiles and says, \"How are you doing, dear girl? I suspect things are well with you and others down in the kitchens and scullery?\" Ah, isn\'t she being funny! One can almost sense the hefty dose of sarcasm in her voice, as her bright eyes view the woman in front of her with some amusement. Who knew the once Chamberlain of Black also doubled as Court Jester?

[Qute(#19829)]

The veiled woman, for some reason, had not seemed quite so timid upon greeting the Chamberlain. It was as if she had a brief wave of confidence sweep over her for that moment, but now she returns to behaving as one with her position within the Tower would be expected. Bowing her head just the slightest bit, Qute nods after the woman\'s inquiry. \"Yes, I am. My name is Qute.\" If she has a last name, the maid does not mention it, merely offering the name she is most well-known by. \"Oh, things have been getting worse in the Black Tower.\" Her expression turns into one of exasperation, and she lets out a sigh. \"We\'ve been getting paid less and less for our work in the kitchens - and I barely have enough money to scrape by everyday. Times have been hard,\" she admits, glancing down at her worn, old sandals. The woman, apparently, had not expected Naureen to have gotten a glimpse of the gilded bracelet, at which sleeve she again tugs discreetly. A brief pause, and Qute then returns the question, \"And how have things been faring you lately, madam?\" The last word is uttered with a tone of subservience.

[Naureen(#30298)]

Naureen\'s amusement quickly fades to a more grave look of apprehension and woe, as she watches the kitchen maid. \"Ah, yes, hard times are upon us all...\" Her gaze again travels to general area of the arm on which the bracelet is worn, but quickly upturning her eyes she takes a long, deep sigh and says, sadly, \"The Emperor must be getting really desperate if he expects to treat all his workers so poorly while making his crazy plans about overturning the rising tide of revolt against him.\" Covering her face with the shawl, again, she speaks in hushed whispers, \"Tell this to no one, my dear, but I have resigned my post as the Chamberlain. If the Emperor is going to take us all down with him, I refuse to be a part of his insane plans.\" She now nods her head in self-righteous justification, \"I would not want you to be a part of it, either. I wish,--\" she sighs, again, \"I wish I could do something to rid us of his baleful presence that brings shame and disgrace to our estimable Black Tower. Ah, we were once the pride of Umbar! I wish I could return things to how they were...\" With that thought, her lips twist downwards as dull waters of wretched sorrow brim at the edge of her eyes.

Then, she looks up and comments offhand. \"That is a lovely bracelet you are wearing, my dear. A family heirloom?\" she asks, her face mirroring no small amount of fake curiously.

[Qute(#19829)]

The simple maid nods at Naureen\'s words, her features portraying enthusiastic agreement with what is said of the Emperor. Although another wary gaze is cast around the perimeter, as if to check whether anyone may be spying on their small meeting. \"I believe Lord Alphros - or at least, his followers - might aid in the overthrowing of the Emperor. Although I\'m not sure it\'ll be for the best,\" Qute muses with an air of genuine sorrow. Upon the admittance of Naureen resigning from her position, the woman\'s eyebrows arch noticeably, and she nods. Just as she opens her mouth to say something more, her face pales slightly adrenalin rushing through her body when Naureen takes notice of the bracelet. \"Oh... yes, it was passed onto me by mother,\" the maid confides in the woman. She attempts to keep her tone as calm and pleasant as possible in the situation, although her cheeks turn a very light shade of pink. Luckily her face is mostly concealed by the veil, still. \"Isn\'t it lovely? I.. I would never think of selling it. No matter how desperate things may get.\" She pulls back the sleeve about an inch or two, so that the ex-Chamberlain may get a better view of the Empress\' stolen bracelet.

[Naureen(#30298)]

A shapely brow is arched high and Naureen cants her head to the side. \"Lord Alphros to come to the aide of the Black Tower?\" she asks, pointlessly reiterating the news just recounted to her by Qute. The question is left hanging in the air, for it is obviously answered, and the ex-Chamberlain allows the information to settle somewhere in her mind. She nods her head, then, and says full of understanding, \"I agree with you, Qute. It would certainly not be for our best!\" Her black eyes narrow and she takes a tiny step forward. Leaning into the kitchen maid like a co-conspirator discussing plans of some crime, she says, \"Can you imagine what would happen if he came to our aid? He\'d be heralded as the savior of Black! He\'d put himself up as the rescuer of our people.\" Getting all her feathers ruffled by the mere thought of such dire possibilities, she spurts out the foreseeable results excitably. \"All our loyal Corsairs and warriors would leave us and join him, for they\'d think him the better man. We would be ruined!\" After a very long and deep intake of the stinky air into her lungs, Naureen shakes her head and calms down.

Seconds later, with a surprising note of hope ringing quietly in her voice, she looks at Qute wistfully. \"If only we could find a hero from amongst us, then he could champion our cause and help us get rid of the foul rot that has taken root in the very stone of our Tower.\"

She smiles the smile of a forlorn fool who has fanciful dreams of Lady Fate. \"Why, even you could be our Knight in Shining Amour!\" She grins, \"A mere kitchen maid come to our help, in our darkest hour. You rid us of the evil bastard, that,--\" and her jaw clenches tightly as her teeth grind against each other angrily, \"That Steward who is still keeping the Emperor around, for his own greed, and we can restore order without any need of any assistance from outsiders!\"

Of course, having stirred herself up into quite a state of vexation, it is only after she has vented out all her frustrations that Naureen recognizes the bracelet of the Empress on the hand of the kitchen maid. Saying nothing, she merely keeps her peace momentarily.

[Qute(#19829)]

The kitchen maid nearly erupts in laughter at the other woman\'s suggestion of her being the knight in shining armour come to their rescue. \"Oh, that\'s quite amusing,\" she offers a good-natured smile to Naureen. \"No no no, we must find someone to figure out a solution to this mess. But I don\'t know anyone - it is you who have all the connections within Black.\" The maid then leans forward slightly, and pulls the veil down from her face, revealing the grin on her features. \"And don\'t you worry about Alphros. That woman who gave a speech in support of him the other day at the Market Square -- the crowd wasn\'t too receptive. Nobody seemed to have faith in Lord Alphros they\'re too worried that he\'ll raise their taxes or turn out to be just like the Emperor,\" Qute says. \"In fact, most people believe /he/ planned the assassination of his own sister at the Square.\" Her brows shoot up, and she nods once as if to confirm what she just said. \"Still, Black must find someone else.. someone else to replace its current leaders.\" The final few words are uttered almost in a whisper, for fear of eavesdroppers. \"Oh, and -- this is something I just heard earlier last night. While I was in the Dark Citadel, the High Priestess had been telling someone about the Steward acting in a bizarre and threatening manner against her. Almost as if he\'d wanted to kill her!\" And she then retracts away from Naureen again, regaining a normal position. \"But yes.. I wish. I wish we could somehow find a solution to this ourselves. Perhaps if someone could sneak poison into the Steward\'s dinner,\" Qute says, with an obvious air of self-mockery.

Nasrudin has entered the alleyway from the Rath Bad-nez.

Nasrudin has arrived.

[Naureen(#30298)]

The morning sun draws into the sky and lightens the spirits of those in the alleyway, even one as filthy and foul as the present.

It seems there two occupants of the narrow gully are talking amongst themselves. Both women, Naureen and Qute, are dressed in dark clothes and long shawls, also of a dark color, as if they were meeting here clandestine.

When Qute laughs in her face at the idea of her being Black Tower\'s last hope, Naureen\'s face falls and her high hopes are dashed to nothing. She looks mournfully at the other woman and says, \"Tsk, silly woman. Don\'t mock my plans. You could just as well kill the Steward and take his place.\" A small smile now paints on her lips. \"I have worked in the Tower long enough to see ordinary men and women rise from low ranks to high stations, just because they have confidence in themselves, the strenght of their arms, and they have the intelligence and the support of their family.\" Her narrow chin jerks towards Qute and she says, with a wink, \"I can already see in you an intelligent woman. You are a good listener and,--\"

She now points towards the stolen bracelet, \"You certainly are confident enough to steal from the Empress and have the knack of picking up things along the way, or using arms to get what you want.\" And by that statement, there is no sense of threat or warning in her tone. The ex-Chamberlain of Black Tower grins and says, \"As far as your little idea of poisoning the Steward,\" She pauses for a brief moment of thought, before continuing. \"A fine one it is, no doubt! I know just the person from whom to get the right kind of poison, if you know how to cook the kind of dish that our fool will not be able to resist.\" A decidedly evil gleam now sparkles in her gaze, as Naureen develops on the plan. \"We get rid of the Steward, and the Emperor loses his one crutch to support his dastardly and foolish deeds.\" She breaks into laughter, now, \"And seeing as he is already quite insane, the mere fact that we cut off his right-hand, we might not even need to get our hands dirty should he decide to run off into the desert like his wife, the Empress.\"

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

From around the corner emerges a rotund belly, followed by the remainder of Nasrudin, who strides cheerily into the abysmal tunnel where the feminine pair are engaged in conversation. A well-known tune issues from his lips in a quite tone, recounting the valor of men who have done something worth remembering. On one shoulder wrests a grey parrot, idly pecking at the fellow\'s left ear, and on the other, a large melon.

[Qute(#19829)]

A disbelieving brow is arched upon hearing the other woman\'s response to her original dismissal of Naureen\'s ideas. This happens right after the comment regarding the murdering of the Steward. Perhaps Qute had not expected the other woman to be quite so forward, or to follow so closely to the maid\'s own unsaid line of thinking. The rest of what Naureen said is just treated as mostly filler, and the maid\'s expression seems rather distant and pensive. Almost as if she were already thinking of how to go through with such a plan. Qute is not brought back into the present until there is a mention of the stolen bracelet. At this, the edge of lips instantly curve downward, forming part of an almost shocked appearance. Figuring it is no use denying this fact, the woman simply buries the bracelet-bearing hand under her shawls, her face turning a pale color again. The maid takes a step back, almost as if in sudden distrust of the ex-Chamberlain. However, what draws her to stay put is the further discussion of the plan to poison the Steward. At that particular moment, however, the sound of quickly-approaching whistling is heard, and Qute decides to lean closer to the other woman\'s ear, muttering something in a low tone. Straightening herself, the kitchen maid then turns to visually investigate the source of the whistled tune. \"Good morning, sir!\" Qute offers an innocent nod, and a slight wave of her hand.

[<#19829>] Qute +whispers to you, \"Yes, I think I\'ll be quite able to do that. I will prepare one of his favorite dishes in the coming week. But, you say you know of someone who would have the poison? How soon do you think this could be done?\"

[Naureen(#30298)]

As Qute deliberates slowly on the idea of bringing down the Steward, Naureen says little. She, too, stands still as a ghost, her countenance revealing nothing of the myriad thoughts that play in her mind. But, perhaps the bright light of proud achievement in her eyes would tell you something of her satisfaction at having manipulated the maid enough to make her consider killing the Steward and aspiring to take his place. When the other woman bends forward to whisper words into her ears, she willingly reaches out to hear what she has to say.

The unexpected arrival of Nasrudin and his parrot, however, put a glitch into her plans of elaborating on whatever it is they were discussing. Nodding her head, she merely says, \"I will take care of it.\" Nothing more is offered, as she turns to the newcomer into the stinky alley and looking at him with suspicion, she jerks her chin and asks, \"Who are you and why are you here?!\" My-my, doesn\'t she think she owns the pitiful place!

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"Is it a good morning? Really?\" Nasrudin responds to Qute\'s salutation with a genuine, beaming smile. \"Zounds, I have not heard of someone truly having a /good/ morning in a very long time indeed!\" Soon, the bulbous man has come to stand nearby the two conspirators. \"Please tell me, what has happened?\" He grins with anticipation, eyes smiling brightly. \"Has the civil war come to an end? Have the people of Gondor given us all their land and money, and volunteered to be our slaves? Have horses grown wings?\" Thinking nothing of the whisper that passes between then, he turns to Naureen. \"Now, that is a good question indeed, and would require a great deal of time, and at least twice as many words as exist in our language to answer! But,\" he looks at her gravely, \"who are /you/, and what are /you/ doing here? Hmm? Do you know?\"

[Qute(#19829)]

Qute manages a somewhat amused smile in return to Nasrudin\'s enthusiastic demeanor. \"Oh, I was just discussing with my cousin here, about some good news -- I\'m about to be married.\" The words seem to spill out of her mouth, as if she could not think of anything else to say. Why else would she be in such a delightful mood? \"I was just on my way back from the Dark Citadel towards the market. I figured this would be the shortest route,\" the maid explains to the pot-bellied man with another nod, before turning back to Naureen with an expectant smile, as if it is now her turn to say something.

[Naureen(#30298)]

Naureen looks at Nasrudin with a fair bit of shock, at first. Perhaps she has been hiding in the Black Tower while conspiring against the Emperor for too long to meet the more ordinary folks that dwell in Umbar. The fat fellow\'s audacity at questioning her so boldly, while evading to answer her question, however, does not please her one bit. Her black eyes draw into thin slits and she stares at him. \"Has the fat on your belly gone and wrapped itself around your brain, as well?\" she asks him, while looking at him with despise and disgust. She then turns to her cousin, Qute, and smiles. Leaning forward, she kisses the woman\'s cheek and says, \"I will buy the flowers and the make sure that everyone is sent the invitations. I will also get your dress,\" She frowns, \"Although I know you paid that merchant FAR too much!\" She taps her chin, thoughtfully. \"Perhaps I can get him to throw in a pair of new slippers for robbing you so blindly!\" she exclaims, the idea just having sprouted into her head. And ignoring Nasrudin, she carries on like he wasn\'t even present. \"Now you go home and get some rest. Puffy eyes will not help you if you want to look your best.\"

\"Oh, and remember to meet me tomorrow at The Den. I will get all the purchases with me.\" Now, considering that The Den is perhaps the most vile and disreputable drinking hole in Umbar, why two perfectly good women would be meeting there is an open guess!

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"You are to be married? Wonderful, my dear girl! You are so beautiful, you will make a man a fine wife no doubt, and a delightful bed-mate to be sure!\" A raucous laugh bubbles from his lips. \"This deserves a celebration!\" On a sudden, he lifts his melon high over head and lets it fall against the pavement of the alleyway - predictably, it bursts into two large halves. Nimble fingers lay hold of the knife in his belt and set to work dividing it, after which he offers a piece to each of the ladies. \"Fresh and cool,\" he commends the fruit enticingly, seemingly quite unperturbed by Naureen\'s ambivalence. Meanwhile, his parrot alights on the ground and helps himself to a share.

[Qute(#19829)]

The \'bride\' nods quickly to Naureen. \"Oh, thank you, cousin. I don\'t know how I\'d ever handle this all without you!\" She exclaims, outstretching her arms and embracing Naureen in a warm hug. She then retracts, and adjusts the dark shawls she wears again, before bending down to take a good, wholesome slice of watermelon that the pot-bellied man has just cracked open. \"Oh, thank you, kind sir. Blessings be upon you!\" The maid bows her head slightly to the man, before taking a step back. \"Ah, yes, you mean my place? Of course, tomorrow it is, then.\" Qute gives a quick glance back to Naureen, before offering a final farewell to this small gathering, \"I must be off to buy some extra spices at the market. I\'ll be cooking up my finest dish tonight. Farewell to you,\" The young woman gives a final nod to Nasrudin, before turning on her feet and heading off towards the south in a hurried pace.

[Naureen(#30298)]

Naureen spies Nasrudin bursting open the melon and then proceeding to offer the juicy slices, and shaking her head she rolls her eyes to the sky above. \"Maybe the summer heat has gone straight to his head,\" she comments to no one in particular. However, despite her initial dislike for the man and his general state of being, she is unable to resist his tempting fruit! Licking the corner of her lips, she takes his proffered slice and says, \"Maybe you should eat some of that yourself, before your parrot gobbles up the whole thing. It will cool you down, at least.\" And even after making her snappy and rude remarks, she does bite into the fruit and enjoys its \'fresh and cool\' taste with unabashed delight, and without so much as a hint of shame at her abhorrent behavior towards Nasrudin.

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"My head is quite cool enough thank you,\" Nasrudin replies to Naureen in an amicable tone, \"and quite free of fat, I can gratefully claim,\" he adds with no less good humor. \"Ah, but farewell,\" he says to Qute, making no secret of rubbing his eyes on the curves that give shape to her clothes as she moves for her departure. \"Blessings be upon you as well, for if the young women of Harad are not blessed, who among us can hope to be?\" His attention is given to Naureen once more. \"I would eat some, except that I do not like melon! You see, I bought it in order to torture my cursed parrot here, for melon is his favorite, and I enjoy tempting him with it, as his beak is too small to break the rind.\" With a chortle, he concludes, \"It is your lucky day Khasim,\" said to the bird, \"you owe the newly wed a debt of gratitude, for it is because of her that you are able to enjoy this fruit at the moment!\"

[Naureen(#30298)]

Naureen is so busy eating her slice of melon, that she nearly misses the departure of her cousin. Turning around, she waves her hands excitedly and says, \"See you tomorrow, then! Good-bye! And give my aunt and uncle my love,\" she has a big smile on her lips as she continues, \"Oh, and say hello to your good brother, too! And my darling nieces and nephews.\" Oh. My. God. Is she going to name her whole family in the farewell, now? Luckily, she stops and again giving Nasrudin and Khasim her attention, she bends on the ground and reaches out her hand to almost touch the bird. Ah, but pulling it away just as soon as she has put it out, she says to the jovial, round man, \"Does he bite? Is he tame? Can he talk?\" A lot of questions for someone who did not think too highly of Nasrudin in the first place!

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"Well,\" says Nasrudin, \"Khasim is no more likely to bite than the average man, no more prone to aggression than the average man, and his infernal speech sometimes make more sense than that of the average man!\" The parrot hisses menacingly as Naureen reaches toward him, and spreads his wings, tongue protruding from his sharp, black maw.

[Naureen(#30298)]

The hand returns right back to the safety of her lap, as Naureen decides otherwise on reaching out for the bird and trying to pet it. Eying it with distrust and renewed dislike, she says to Nasrudin, with irritability, \"How now can you compare a bird to a man?! We are far superior to your silly parrot, here, intelligent as he may be at reciting a few lines of speech.\" She runs her finger along her nose and scratches the tip. \"Unless, of course, all men are like you.\" Ah! And there she goes again with her smart tongue, insulting anybody and all.

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"I can compare /this/ bird to a man,\" explains Nasrudin, \"because he is selfish, hostile and speaks nonsense, as surely almost all men do!\" Nodding sagely, he reaches down himself to stroke Khasim and gently runs his palm over the bird\'s head and back. \"But, also like a man, he accepts kindness when it is offered. If you would like to stroke him, do so when he has finished his melon, and he will not think that you mean to take it from him.\" The paunchy fellow is clearly not insulted.

[Naureen(#30298)]

Insulted or not, Naureen knows when she is receiving a backhanded slap on the wrist. Sniffing her nose and turning it into the air, she says to Nasrudin, \"I dare not touch your bird. From the vicious look it gave me earlier, I am sure he wants to rip my flesh right from my bone!\" That the bird tickles her interest, however, is clear. Dark eyes watch its every movement as the bird eats the melon, and looking on it with no small amount of curious fancy she says, arching a fine brow, \"If he can speak, what does he say? Can you get him to talk for me?\"

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

On cue, the bird warbles and squawks unintelligibly. Winging the short distance from the ground to Nasrudin\'s shoulder, the parrot settles on a perch and begins to preen its grey feather. \"You see, it is not difficult to get him to talk to you! It seems you have offended Khasim - he said that he did not want you to stroke him anyway.\" The bird looks conspicuously sullen and mopey. \"As to the flesh on your bones, I doubt that he would have found you appetizing. He likes juicy meat, like mine!\" Nasrudin displays a few nicks and scars on his neck and shoulder, apparently having received them from his avian companion.

[Naureen(#30298)]

Perfectly disappointed by Khasim\'s lack of acceptable performance in the department of entertaining her with intelligible speech, Naureen look on the parrot with a grimace on her face. \"Hah, a good thing we are starved at the Tower, then.\" she says, \"Or I am sure he\'d snap my finger right off.\" Naureen seems to have quite the talent for exaggeration, it seems. \"Say \'Naureen\',\" she instructs the bird. \"And stop being so bad-tempered and peevish. You have nothing to be upset about! At least you don\'t have to deal with a raving mad Emperor who is bringing down your name, while the rest of your flock try to burn your nest and drive you from house and home.\" \'Bahing\' at Khasim, Naureen gets up to her feet and says to Nasrudin. \"I don\'t suppose I caught your name, my good fella. I am called Naureen, by the way.\" She actually smiles, now, when making her introduction as she nearly dips forward in greeting. Nearly, mind you, for she quickly straightens her back as a churlish frown twists along the end of her lips when she realizes what she was doing.

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"Ah, you\'ve answered my question at last, that is who you are: Naureen,\" Nasrudin repeats the name as though it might as well be mud, \"which is to say, you do not know.\" He smiles at her kindly. \"And no doubt you fare much worse than my cursed Khasim, for you are dealing with a raving emperor and other such hardships as you have named. But then, such is the lot for most of us.\" His mood sharply improves as he adds, \"Take heart, and be glad we have the emperor we have - who is to say that a new one would not be worse?\"

[Naureen(#30298)]

Naureen, it seems, is not paying quite as much attention to Nasrudin and his talk as much as she is watching the parrot on his shoulder. Well, that is with the exception of his last remark. Turning to him with renewed interest, she says, \"Now stop talking like an idiot who has been living under a rock! Have you not heard? We will have no more Emperors in Umbar! Umbar will return to its old ways of the Tower Lords, and instead of having a single tyrant to rule us all, we will have four or five arrogant cut-throats who would vie for power, money and control over the city.\" She takes a deep breath and shakes her head. \"Take heart that all of the old noble families have not woken up and aren\'t claiming the titles of Tower Lord, while the Emperor is still around. I would still have a commoner amongst their lot, as a Tower Lord, so that I at least have the peace of mind that someone from our ranks is up there looking out for us.\"

Naureen whispers, as an afterthought to Nasrudin. \"That is not to say that Lord Alphros of Farside will not grab the crown right off the Emperor\'s head for himself! He has already gone and claimed Kingship of Gondor. Fear the Eye and what other big plans he is making as soon as he has done with the Emperor!\"

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"Six tyrants are better than one?\" questions Nasrudin, \"I see it as six times higher odds of being accosted, after all, one man is much easier to avoid than six. Besides, do you really expect them to look after us,\" he pauses, \"at least, at times when our best interests do not correspond to their own?\" He shrugs, \"I am content to leave them o behead one another as they please, or not. It makes no difference to me.\" As Naureen adds further commentary, so does he. \"Alphoros, or whatever his name is, can have both the crown and Gondor for all I care, and anything else he wants.\" He chuckles merrily, \"as long as he does not take the air from my lungs and the marrow from my bones!\"

[Naureen(#30298)]

Nasrudin\'s complete lack of interest in the state of political affairs is something of a mystery to Naureen. And even though she might try to hide it, she cannot help but tell him this: \"My goodness, man! How can you be so complacent? Alphros might just be our next Emperor and rather than have him turn into another despot ruling us all in his own merry fashion, I would rather have six of them keeping a check and balance on each other.\" Her head sways from side to side at her disbelief on hearing the paunchy man\'s words. Then, reaching out to Khasim, she strokes his neck, if he would allow it, and speaks to him. \"Now you, my pretty friend. I am sure you don\'t share the opinions of your Master here, do you? I am sure you\'d rather have two: one who will feed you happily, while this one tortures you by being selfish and perverse.\"

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

The parrot accepts the affection, torquing his head just so as she scritches his skull. \"Imagine a man with six heads - what would such a man accomplish, save to waste his time in six different ways? We are better off with a single emperor. Under one leader, we can better defend our country and assail our enemies. If we do not like the emperor, it is much easier, and far less messy, to remove one man from power than six. And, should the need arise, one good man is much easier to find than six good men, though finding one is no easy task.\" Nasrudin is quite satisfied with his reasoning. \"Perhaps this Alphoros will make a better king than the one we have, after all, I do like a man with ambition - if he is focused on taking Gondor, he will not be focused on taking my coin!\"

[Naureen(#30298)]

Really flabbergasted by his opinion, Naureen just glares at Nasrudin while petting his bird. \"Don\'t let anyone catch you talking like that,\" she tells him, warily, \"Or you might just find yourself stabbed in the gut for speaking against the good intentions of Lord Farside. The man practically poses himself to be our next hero of old, so if you tarnish his image he might not take kindly to it.\" To the parrot, she now says, \"Or you, pretty Khasim, would be quite abandoned, without Master and melons.\" Drawing her hand away, now, she waves it dismissively in the air. \"As for your coin? Well, don\'t expect it to stay in your pocket for too long. I am sure Lord Alphros will raise taxes as soon as he gets the chance. His war with Gondor did not go to well, and our treasuries are nearly empty by the looks of it! Unless he goes and fights the tarks again, I don\'t see how we will have any more money left to live on. The Eye knows we do not trade with Gondor at all these days, now that he has gone and claimed a right to the throne!\"

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"Money is not hard to come by,\" is Nasrudin\'s retort. \"It is much more difficult to find something worth spending it on.\" Fiddling with his beard, the portly man adds, \"Perhaps I will seek out this Alphros, as no one needs a hero more than me! Do you know if he is in need of a nosehair plucker? Or perhaps a rope untier? Ah, but of course, he will need someone to try his shoes on for him, in case they are poisoned by an assassin! All of these are my top skills.\"

[Naureen(#30298)]

Watching Nasrudin with perplexed confusion, Naureen tells him, snappily, \"Don\'t you have a wife, already? If not, get yourself a mistress. Get yourself two mistresses. I am sure they will spend your money for you, happily, and without much difficulty.\" She shakes her head. \"Tell you what, pay ME the right price and I will find you a dozen good trollops to choose as your mistress.\" Of course, it is no small rumor that floats around the city of Umbar that Naureen runs a brothel somewhere and that is just validated right now! \"As for trying Lord Alphros\' shoes.\" She laughs. \"He is too well-loved for anyone to poison him just yet. Give it some time and I am sure he will take you up on the offer, while paying you a pittance, no less.\"

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"Me? Pay a prostitute?\" Nasrudin snorts incredulously. \"It is any woman who should in fact pay me, for I am as well endowed as a donkey, and have more skill with my tongue than a cat! For a gold coin, I will prove it!\" The old, portly fellow waggles his brow as he scrutinizes Naureen\'s body.

[Naureen(#30298)]

For a minute Naureen is speechless. And, perhaps for the first time, words, indeed, have left her completely! Recovering from this systemic shock, she says to the man with a dirty look of offense on her face. \"You keep that tongue right in your mouth, where it belongs, for I have no desire to experience your skill with it.\" Then, shaking her head, she waves her hand at him and says, \"As desirable as you are and with all your sexual prowess, I best get on my way before you use that clever tongue to change my mind. I have already found myself quite fond of your bird, and I do not think I would like to get any closer to know you.\" Turning her back, she now walks away down the alley...

[Nasrudin(#22125)]

\"What I meant,\" protests Nasrudin, \"is that I work as hard as donkey, being endowed with muscles!\" He flexes his arms, and continues, \"and that my tongue is honeyed, like that of a cat, for I can sing poetry to a woman like no other!\" The man lilts a brief verse of a romantic song. \"Oh well,\" he says, turning to his parrot, \"at least I will always have you!\" Khasim promptly nips him on the nose.

Voila! C\'est fini.